You might be ready to stop spending your life avoiding the things you are afraid of.
Anxiety can look like avoiding certain people, places, activities or circumstances because they trigger uncomfortable feelings. It’s possible that you’ve built an entire life around avoiding these things.
Perhaps you are now ready to look at your anxiety because you are starting to see how it’s impacting the lives of the people who are closest to you. It’s one thing if you are not participating fully in life, but when the people you love are missing out because of you, this brings up feelings of shame, embarrassment and guilt.
You might be feeling exhausted with always needing to manage and control the people and circumstances around you. On a very deep level, you know that you do this not because you enjoy it, but because you are trying to protect yourself from those triggering events.
At a certain point anxiety can start to feel like a self-made prison. When anxiety arises, you make certain decisions to try and feel better. Those decisions lead to other uncomfortable feelings. You can sense you are always chasing a feeling of relief that never lasts, and it becomes exhausting. Without help, this can all begin to feel very overwhelming and pointless.
Most people are living their lives from a place of fear.
It is oftentimes deeply rooted in the subconscious, based on childhood experiences, and the person isn’t even consciously aware that fear is the motivating force behind his or her actions.
In some cases, a person is aware that fear is running the show, but because that fear has driven them to take actions that have brought them perceived success in life – career, marriage, family, home, vacations, etc. – they accept fear as part of what it means to be an adult and live their lives accordingly.
There are also those of us who become aware of the role fear and anxiety play in our lives and we want to break free from it. We have a deep desire to live from a place of peace, and not from a place of fear. We want to learn how to get rid of anxiety.
We feel that living with anxiety is deeply troubling, impacts our well-being and those around us, and that life is too precious to feel this way all the time. We are willing to do the work it takes to figure out how to overcome anxiety.
It is possible to change your relationship with anxiety.
Fear and anxiety are human emotions that are part of the experience of being alive. We can’t eliminate them entirely. But, we can change our relationship with fear and anxiety and spend a much larger portion of our lives feeling a sense of inner peace.
In my own life I experienced a paradigm shift. Before the shift, my normal state was one of anxiety where I experienced moments of relief from time-to-time. The relief came from temporary distractions like alcohol, food, coffee and shopping, and the relief was never long lasting. Now my normal state is one of relief (or inner peace) where I experience moments of anxiety from time-to-time.
Things are different now because I have the tools I need for dealing with anxiety when it arises, so that I can keep returning to my new normal, which is a place of inner peace.
If I can make this kind of change, so can you!
My coaching will provide you with the tools and support you need to free yourself from the grip of anxiety.
My coaching is based on the premise that nothing is wrong with you, it’s only that you have developed some habits that aren’t particularly useful anymore. The habits have to do with thinking, believing, feeling, responding, avoiding, seeking. Through the examination of these habits, you will naturally open up to doing what you don’t normally do, and this is how you genuinely change over time and learn how to cope with anxiety.
It’s not a sexy, glamorous, over-the-top, leave-everything-behind-and-get-a-new-life kind of change. Rather, it’s a change in the experience of normal, mundane, everyday life.
This is a big deal when we are struggling to make it through day-to-day life.
It’s a change that is genuine and that lasts. It’s a return to inner peace, and a sense of being comfortable in your own skin. It’s a calm inside that runs steady and deep, as life continues to bring its ups and downs.
The thought of facing your fears might be too terrifying to imagine.
I felt this way too at the start of my own journey. I had been holding on to childhood trauma for over 40 years, and I was convinced that facing the emotional pain related to that trauma would be the end of me. I really believed it was too much pain for any one person to handle.
The beauty of this process is that you will never be given more than you can handle. The exploration of your anxiety happens incrementally at a pace set by you. If you are willing to explore, the exact amount that you can handle in the moment of exploration will be made available for you to deal with and process.
The coaching work I do is experiential rather than philosophical. This means that we will spend our time feeling into what is actual happening with you in the present moment, rather than just talking about it and analyzing it. This is one of the key reasons my coaching can have more impact in a shorter amount of time compared to years of traditional talk therapy.
Maybe you don’t believe that it’s possible for you to learn how to stop anxiety.
A big part of moving past anxiety is the practice of studying your self. That means studying your thoughts, beliefs, feelings and behaviors.
During our coaching sessions, I will teach you the art of studying your self. We will practice this together, using the real life situations that are currently causing you to feel anxious or afraid. Over time, as you continue with the practice, you will become able to do more and more of the work on your own.
With intention and practice, you will begin to develop a new perspective on and relationship with your anxiety. With time your old habits will fall away naturally, and you will begin to have a new experience of day-to-day life.
It’s not that your life will ever be 100% free of fear and anxiety, but eventually the intensity of these emotions will lessen dramatically, and you will have more tools at your disposal for dealing with fear and anxiety when they come up.
If your life is currently built around managing your anxiety, you might be afraid of how life will be without it.
It is very common to resist change, even when it’s a change for the better!
The thing to remember is that learning to cope with anxiety is a process that happens over time. There are no magic bullet overnight solutions. You will have time to adjust to a new life without anxiety!
In addition, you get to set the pace of your own transformation. Some people have had it with living with anxiety and are ready to dive right in head first. Other people take a slow but steady approach, tackling issues one by one. Each person’s journey is unique and our work will be custom tailored to you and your situation.
" If I could share a few words that come to mind when working with Diana it would be: kind, compassionate, open, heard. I am grateful that over the course of numerous sessions with Diana I have been witnessed and heard. I have gently been given awareness around areas that I was holding resistance or fear around. Even with the long distance calls I felt a connection and an honoring of myself by Diana, that has helped me to heal on a deeper level of which I had not thought possible. I would highly recommend Diana on your own inner healing journey. "
About the Author
Diana Calvo is a certified life coach and registered psychotherapist who helps people get unstuck and transform their day-to-day experience of work and life. After 20 years successfully climbing the corporate ladder, Diana experienced her own journey of healing and awakening. She discovered her true calling to guide others on their journey out of suffering and into a life of purpose and joy. Diana left the corporate world to start her own coaching business. She lives in Denver, Colorado with her dog Joey and a beautiful view of the mountains. She works with clients across the globe.