GRIEF therapy
Do you feel overwhelmed by the loss of a loved one or the end of a significant relationship?
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Since the loss of your friend, partner, or family member, is life feeling like a roller coaster?
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Do painful feelings related to a divorce or break-up sneak up on you unexpectedly?
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Have you ever wondered how long this difficulty will last?
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Are you wishing you could just get over it already?
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Do you find that talking with the people in your life, even though they have good intentions, is not always helpful?
The death of a loved one, or the end of a significant relationship, can be a devastating experience. The emotional intensity of loss can be all over the map, ranging from grief to rage to despair to relief and more. You might also experience the strangeness of having your day-to-day reality change so dramatically while the mundane details of life continue. There can be a sense of wondering, “When will things get back to normal?” or “Will I ever feel okay again?” If you aren’t getting the support you need isolation can creep in, which only makes things worse. Feeling like no one understands can become an added burden on top of the painful feelings you may already be experiencing. It can feel impossible to navigate a way forward while trying to cope with so many emotions.
Most of us never learned what to do when someone we love dies, an important person gets sick, or a significant relationship ends.
Somewhere along the way western culture lost the ritual aspect of dealing with death and loss. While every person grieves differently, no one is meant to grieve alone. We all need some form of support in order to process the death or loss of someone we care about. Dominant cultural norms often encourage us to get over it and move on as quickly as possible. As a result, we never learned how to be with death or how to be with our personal experience of losing someone. It can feel like having no idea what to do. There is also the tendency to want to skip over the uncomfortable emotions that are part of acknowledging loss and grieving what is no more. The feelings are so painful that many people try to ignore their feelings and move on to the next thing as quickly as possible.
The good news is that grief and loss counseling can provide you the support you need to cope with loss, to honor your memories, and to move forward with your life.
Denver grief counseling can help you discover a way forward in the face of sickness, aging, divorce, death, and other forms of loss.
I'm trained in Contemplative Psychotherapy, which is built upon a Buddhist understanding of the human experience. Buddhist Psychology considers the reality of death and loss, and the natural tendency we have as human beings to turn away from this truth. I've also trained with the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Caregiving, during which I spent time with people who were living with illness and close to death. I also explored and planned for the reality of my own death. Grief has been a significant theme in my own life through experiences of estrangement, divorce, re-homing pets, changing careers, and death of loved ones.
Some of the ways in which I support clients around grief include:
• realistic self-care practices;
• remembering and honoring the person who died or the relationship that ended;
• staying in relationship with the person who died;
• making time to grieve while continuing to live;
• ritual around loss and renewal;
• balancing needs to feel grief with needs to distract from grief;
• trusting that the pain of the loss will change over time;
• living with loss;
• moving forward with your own life;
• reading and discussing materials on death/grief/loss together;
• attuning to and honoring personal needs with respect to the grieving process
• recognizing "grief waves" when they come and having tools available for coping in the moment
You might be feeling embarrassed or frustrated that you can’t just get over your loss and move on with your life.
An important aspect of moving on is the willingness to feel your feelings. Paradoxically, it is in the trying to avoid the pain of loss, or in believing that we can just skip over the grief associated with loss, that we create a great deal of suffering for ourselves.
When you stop resisting grief, and allow yourself to feel it, there is a tremendous amount of emotional relief. Ultimately, with time, the intensity of the grief lessens considerably. Also, because you have now experienced your grief, you no longer fear it. For many people, the absence of fear is an incredible source of emotional liberation.
Perhaps you believe grieving is something to do privately, and you are uncomfortable expressing your grief to another person.
Even though you might believe you have to do it all on your own, the truth is that you are not meant to do life alone. We exist in relationship to others, and we process our thoughts and feelings in a different way when another person is present. Being witnessed by someone else is an extremely powerful force for healing.
Maybe your grief is complicated by trauma, anger, or other lived experiences.
If you have experienced trauma in connection with the person you are grieving, your grief might feel more complicated. You might feel sad about this person’s death, and at the same time, you might also be experiencing a sense of relief or anger. These types of emotions can be confusing and difficult to navigate. I can support you with trauma and grief counseling in a way that is respectful of your experience. You can determine how fast or slow you want to go. You can be in control of when and how to work with memories and past experiences.
Get the grief counseling support you need in Denver, Colorado.
The emotional pain associated with death, divorce, and other types of losses can be some of the most emotionally intense experiences in a person's lifetime. These experiences are part of life and we aren't meant to go it alone. Grief therapy is an opportunity to experience relief, learn how to cope, and find meaning in experiences that can be difficult to understand.
Let's talk!
In your search for grief therapy in Denver, Colorado, chemistry is everything. You can schedule a free video consultation to see how it feels to talk with me and to ask any questions you may have. If you have particular concerns about grief counseling, I encourage you to bring them up when we meet! Please familiarize yourself with my pricing and logistics before scheduling.